Headlines from today's Washington Post:
Boys are bad at making friends. And it’s at the heart of their violent behavior
Female-driven movies bring a welcome shift in tone to theaters
Do Father’s Day cards that portray dad as an incompetent boob reflect today’s fathers?
It's been said over and over, and I have no new way of saying it, no new revelations nor wisdom, but the fact that boys (and men) are being seen as superfluous, may I even say dangerous, in today's "enlightened" society mightily grieves this mom of two boys and wife of one amazing man.
Are boys truly bad at making friends or do their friendships not look like what we, their moms, think they should look like? Men were created to protect and defend, would be be willing for our boys to make friends at the local shooting range or hunt club? Men are competitive, perhaps we should allow them to learn to play sports in an arena that actually keeps track of who wins and who loses.
Where did the idea that there are "no winners or losers" come from anyway? Everyone on the sideline knows which team wins. Why not celebrate the hard work of the winners and give the losing team something to strive for?
Do we really just want to see just "female driven" movies? There aren't enough bad romcom movies already? Really? Any woman who is honest and who has spent time in groups of all women/girls knows that there is often no more awful, judgmental, catty place to be. When we dress to go out, or diet to lose weight if we're honest about our intentions we know that we are doing so to impress or be accepted other women. Most men could care less about what we wear or if we're carrying an extra 5, 10 or 20 pounds. They just don't notice. I love my girlfriends and I mightily love my daughter but I know that we are better for having our personalities balanced by the men/boys in our lives. Why must one sex be "better" than another? Why are we not allowed to compliment rather than compete with one another?
Why are boys not allowed to be boys? Sometimes messy, sometimes loud, lover of what seems to me to be disgusting or not-even-the-remotely funny but also helpful, respectful and loving. Perhaps their love comes in the form of killing spiders, digging holes for my garden or changing the oil in my car and not bouquet's of pretty flowers, dusting the living room or romantic, candlelit dinners but it is love. Just because I may have come home and found one of our children's diapers held together with duct tape doesn't make my husband an incompetent boob. He changed a diaper, ran into a problem and solved it. I am grateful. I am loved.
I am worried that the boys that we are raising to be Men of God will be beaten down in this society. I am afraid that the only young men my daughter will meet will be feminized versions of what they could be. I pray continually for the young christian men and women I know. That they will look to scripture and not society for their gender role models. I pray for the unknown spouses of my sons. May they be women who love men. Real men. Real men who love God. Because that is who we're raising them to be.